by Sean Croxton

Don’t eat beaver butt.

Only in a food system this weird would the above recommendation be necessary.

Seriously, who would ever imagine that vanilla and raspberry natural flavorings were derived from secretions from the anal glands of beavers?

Maybe an even better question is who discovered this. And how?

It is a little-known fact that the natural and artificial flavors listed on ingredients labels are a whole list of chemical nastiness themselves.

Unfortunately, you don’t get to see them since they are protected by trade secret laws. To be honest, if I were a food manufacturer I’d want to keep the whole beaver anal glands thing a secret, too.

Maybe that’s the solution. Maybe we should push for the elimination of these trade secrets, thus requiring companies to include what their flavorings are really made out of. Reading a label and stumbling upon the words “beaver ass” may be exactly what we need to get people to think about what they’re putting into their bodies.

Just an idea.